Sometimes the mind just wanders. Mine wandered and the garage now has a slight dent. I backed out, slightly crooked – well more than slightly crooked – and caught the front of the car on a piece of garage door trim. There was a loud CRACK and I had to go and confess to Hubby that I had a brief senior moment regarding the car. I was OK. The car was OK.
The garage was a little bent. Hubby rolled his eyes and hammered the piece of trim back into place – no real harm done.
Did I mention that I HATE backing up in a car? Always have. Always will.
It is amazing how dim-brained it is possible to be. I have made myself a brown bag lunch on many occasions and left it sitting on the kitchen counter. When lunch time rolled around and I realized where my lunch was and that the cafeteria offerings that day were unappetizing at best and I did not have time to run out somewhere and… Well. Sigh.
Sometimes mind hiccups really are just a lack of knowledge. There was that time in college that I stayed up into the wee hours putting a sculpture project together. It was my first experience with epoxy glue. For those of you that don’t know, epoxy glue, when used properly, really STICKS! You guessed it. When I got up the next morning, just in time to race off to sculpture class, I discovered that the glue had leaked and my project was glued to my desk. And I mean GLUED. I had to carve up the top of the desk a bit to retrieve my project. I was only a bit late for class but I sure felt stupid.
There were a couple of real winners when I was student teaching. I got up one morning to find that my brand new car wouldn’t start. The mechanic I called said that I needed a new carburetor. “Gimme one quick,” I said, “I’ve got to get to school.” When I told Dad that tale of woe later, he got a funny look on his face. Even my not-handy-with-cars Dad probably knew that the mechanic had cheated me. How many BRAND NEW cars need new carburetors? Hubby also gave me a pitying look many years later when I told him that story.
The school provided bag lunches for student teachers – every day the same thing. I thought they were feeding me spoiled salami sandwiches. I was too dumb and shy to complain so I started buying my lunch at my student-teaching school. This was easy to justify because that school cafeteria had the most awesome chocolate layer cake as one of their dessert choices. Every day! If one is going to eat the same lunch every day, it might as well include chocolate cake. It was only years later that I learned that the cafeteria’s spoiled salami was really Lebanon bologna and that weird flavor was how it was supposed to taste. Still tastes spoiled to me.
I once left my purse at a theater in Denver. That was a long day with a happy ending. I live sixty miles away from Denver and I didn’t miss the purse until I got home. That meant a second drive to Denver that day to retrieve the purse and the only good part was that theater employees had found the purse and the contents were intact. These days, I’m willing to bet that my identity would have swiftly belonged to someone else. Sometimes lady luck does smile.
Come to think of it, there was another little disaster associated with that sculpture class. This was a plaster casting project which I did in the sculpture studio. Except that after I got the whole thing finished I decided to move it while the plaster was still liquid. My mold wasn’t tightly secured and the plaster ran out of the bottom and flooded the floor with a large white, sticky puddle. It took a while to clean up the mess and then I had to clean the mold, make more plaster and that came close to an all-nighter to get my project finished. Well. Sigh.
There was that time I realized that a not-normally-finicky cat wouldn’t eat because I’d bought dog food instead of cat food. There was also the time I baked Hubby a pecan pie and the pie boiled out of the pie crust and ended up all over the bottom of the stove. Then there was that time at school that a buffing wheel grabbed my finished piece of jewelry, flung it across the room, and tied it into a knot. That was another near all-nighter. And of course there was the band saw that tried to take off the top of my finger just when I was on a creative roll slicing up wooden shoe heals. There was a bit of blood and no, you don’t want to know any more about that. Or about the time that I stapled my finger.
Sometimes setting out on purpose for a weird experience brings astonishing and unexpected learning. For a brief time during my college days streaking was popular. For the young and unknowing, streaking means running swiftly through public places naked. Usually guys. One warm spring day there were posters all over campus advertising an evening mass streak. Everyone invited. My Roomie and I went to check it out. It was quite an event. Roomie and I sat on a comfortable stone wall to watch. There were plenty of naked guys wandering around but they were so drunk that no streaking was happening. They were incapable of fast movement but Roomie and I had a good laugh and also got our first look at multiple – well you know. Well. YUP!
Actually, for a brief while I was good at backing up in a car. When I was student teaching I had to park along any street near the school where I could find a parking space. That invariably led to the need to parallel park. I was awful at it. That first week, I got to school extra early because I knew that it was going to take multiple tries to get into a parking space. By the end of the term, I was a parallel parking wizard. Got it on the first try every time. But unlike riding a bicycle it is entirely possible to forget parallel parking skills. Now, I will ride around endlessly to avoid parallel parking. The skill is gone and I’d have to start from scratch.
Life is too short. There are other dumb learning experiences waiting for me. I have no doubt. Well. Sigh. I hope lady luck hangs around – sometimes to provide laughs and sometimes to help me out.